Don't Dither

According to LessWrong contributor Sarah Constantin, there's a common pattern among people facing major life decisions: they express all the reasons they want to make a change — quit their job, relocate, get married, start a company — but then hesitate and seek validation. Constantin calls this 'dithering,' and she distinguishes it from genuine doubt. Real doubt involves weighing competing reasons and searching for information that could go either way. Dithering is different: everything the person says points toward action; there's no actual obstacle, just a nagging feeling of uncertainty. Constantin argues that following what you genuinely want is typically the right move, even if the outcome turns out to be imperfect. She notes that young people especially tend to underestimate how much they can improve their lives by changing their basic circumstances — where they live, what they work on, or who they spend time with. Her advice: if you've decided what you want to do and you're just waiting for permission or a sign, give yourself permission and act on it.

Listen to this story

Hear this and more stories in a personalized audio briefing.

Open The Chonkerton